貴方たちは友だち

In my first summer as a college student, I met a group of Campus Crusade for Christ people. While I did find them interesting for many reasons, one of the things that struck me was how close they were. These kids were picked from different parts of the country, and had really known each other for a few months before I met them, and yet, they were inseperable, and acted as if they had known each other for years. If Facebook is to be belived, they are still quite close. Maybe not as much as they were when I met them, but they do not treat each other as you would a mere aquaintance. At the time, I assumed this was due to them being Christians. In my experience, many Christians are friendly and open. For us non-religious people, I thought, it takes much longer than a few months to develop such a bond. I think I will be proven wrong on this assumption.

To be honest, I was very pessimistic about making friends here. My biggest fear was actually the other Americans. I was terrified that they would be weaboos, or people who are only interested in the most basic of things Japanese. They're the people that think that by watching hours of anime and clearing Japanese 101 they've become an expert on Japan. To be quite honest, I find these people unbearable, and if the Americans were going to be like that, then I wanted to have nothing to do with them. I was planning to have a bleak and rather lonely year in Japan.

You can imagine my surprise, then, when I made friends here. The Americans are not at all what I thought they would be. True, they have an interest in Japanese pop culture, and possibly pursue hobbies which the average 日本人 would never think about. But their interest has far more depth than anything frivolous. Although a lot of it goes over my head (KPop, JRock, host clubs), it is quite clear that this is not just a passing fancy. And I was also relieved at how they interacted with Japanese culture, something that they may or may not have experienced first hand. What really surprised me was when confronted with foods they had never eaten before, only rarely did they pass on it, or declare that it was inedible. Indeed, with only a few exceptions, they have been most enthusiastic about trying new foods. And it is also worth mentioning that at the ゆかた祭り, they embraced it quite openly. They bought yukata that I felt were worth the money that was spent on them, and had patterns that were very attractive. And none of them fought me when I made it obvious that I did not want to see them wearing shoes, or have their hair down, or something else that would make my ancestors cringe in their graves.

Nine months ago, I can promise you I would not have believed you if you told me how important these people would become to me. How, I would ask, is it possible to become so attached to people you've only known for a few months? How could they become important to you, seeing as they're so unlike you? Why would they be so important to you; you will soon become seperated from them, and in some cases, may never see them ever again? I definitely think that all of us having an interest in Japan has a big thing to do with it. That is one of the common interests we all have. If it wasnt for that, I would have never met these people. And below that, there are the less common, but not less important, similarities, whether it be music, food, or people.

But what really ties us all together is that we've all been there together. We've had to stick together to deal with all the crisises that come with living in unexplored territory. We've cried over relationship problems, and we've laughed at the craziness that comes with mistranslations. We've taken the same ridiculous classes, and also shared countless meals. You know the bond that develops between soldiers on the battlefield? It's a bit of a stretch, but we've been soldiers on this battlefield we call 留学, and we are so very close to victory.

I want to stay in touch with all these amazing kids that I've met here. Facebook and tumblr are poor substitutes for meeting in person, but it's better than nothing. I dont know what the future brings, so I wouldnt rule out that we'll move apart, and on in our lives. But I'm going to try my damndest to keep that from happening. These friendships are so precious to me, and that is something I will always treasure. Thank you, my dear, dear friends.

Reintegrate

Today is July 1st. Normally, this would not be too memorable of a day; regular school is usually on break, and summer school wont begin until after the 4th of July. However, this year is unlike previous years because of my study abroad here in Hiroshima. This day marks the beginning of the last full month I will have in Japan. I will only have two weeks in August before I return to Hawaii, and begin a new year at the University of Hawaii at Manoa. As much as I want to go back home, I am filled with fear, not quite unlike when I came here. While I know that I will overcome them, the uncertainty of it all worries me.

First of all, my friends in Hawaii have changed. Not that this is bad, or unwanted; indeed, it would be wrong of me to have expected them to have stayed frozen in a year. But that's just it; a year has passed, in which they've done things, experienced things, and may not be like when I left them. While as far as I can tell, they're all still friends, they may have met people whom they have become closer to, while there are others who have left their life. How will I deal with this? I would not like to offend anyone, but what if I ask them about someone or something that brings up unpleasant memories or feelings? I cant be sure exactly of what kind of changes have happened, because I have only kept in contact with them through facebook, but I would be really surprised if everything were as when I left Hawaii.

But what really bothers me is how much I've changed. And I'm not talking about my Japanese ability (which, to be honest, got only marginally better, imho). For one thing, I've developed a relationship with alcohol. I still maintain that I'm not a hardcore partier, who drinks it every night, and gets drunk all the time, but I would be lying if I said that it had never happened, or that I understand the allure. But how this will integrate with my life in Hawaii is something I do not know. I know that I will not be able to drink as often as I do here, because I will be more concentrated on my schoolwork. But also, how will I drink? I am not inclined to go clubbing, but will my friends want to join me at 居酒屋? We wont have a lake to gather around like we do here, so will someone's dorm or common area be acceptable? Who will join me? I'd rather not have hardcore people there, but will my regular friends join me, drinking what they will, while I have my 梅酒?

Another hard change for me will probably be focusing on school work. While I never slacked off as hard as some people, I didnt try as hard as I could have in school. I mean, I passed alright, but not as amazingly as I could have. And things havent gotten better here in Japan. Because I dont understand everything the teacher says, I've let a lot of things slip by, instead of looking them up, or noting them down. And it doesnt help that Japanese standards are a lot lower than American ones, which means I'm getting by on things that would never fly in America. I guess you could say that my academic abilities have degraded somewhat here in Japan. However, when I go back to Hawaii, that must change. I'll be entering my senior year, which means I'll be taking more upper division classes. Those are going to be more challenging than anything I've taken before (hopefully), so it is unlikely that I'll be able to just slide along. And also, because they're upper division, they'll be more important to my majors, Japanese and (soon) political science. So it is imperative that I learn what I need to learn from them. But most importantly, since I want to apply to grad school, I'll need to be in top form. I'll need to maintain a high grade point average, and get good grades. I'll also need to get friendly with teachers so that they can write me really good letters of recommendation, or give me advice about the future (class discussions, grad school, jobs). I've said it often, but I really do need to get rid of my bad study habits and kick it into high gear. Japan has encouraged me to slack off; how quickly can I get rid of that kind of mentality?

When I came to Japan, I was worried about getting along with my fellow 留学生 and making new friends. Unexpectedly, I'm having the same worries about going back to Hawaii. Will I still click with my old friends? Can I get out of my Japanese college student mindset and back into an American one? Unfortunately, I will not find out, until I actually get there.